Back when we were discussing Tiger’s temper I listed the things that would get an Offspring removed from the course, and in big trouble at home. The 3 rules we have are, briefly:
Do not EVER throw a club.
Do not blame your bad shot on any one/thing else.
Do not take out your frustration with your game on anyone else.
I am now adding one more rule to the list. If I ever find out one of The Offspring have violated this rule I will turn into a version of Mean ‘Ole Mother that they have previously seen only in their nightmares. ( You did know that’s what ‘mom’ stands for didn’t you? Gets screamed along with ‘That’s not fair’ and ‘Everyone else gets to go’ and is followed by stopping feet and slamming doors. )
Here is the new rule:
You will finish what you start.
The Golfer played in the Club Championship this weekend. We were discussing it and he mentioned that the guy in 2nd place in the Championship flight left after Saturday’s round in 4th place and by the time he arrived for Sunday’s round he was in 2nd place. They teased him that if there was just one more round he would find himself the winner. I was actually paying attention this time and so of course asked him ‘how did he go from 4th to 2nd over night?’ ‘Because the two guys ahead of him withdrew.’ ‘Why? Did they get sick?’ ‘Oh no. They just knew they weren’t going to win, so they withdrew.’
At which point I admit my jaw dropped.
‘They quit, just because they couldn’t win?’ ‘Oh yeah. Happens all the time. I don’t think I’ve ever played in any championship in any mens group where some guys didn’t pull out when it became obvious they weren’t going to win their flight.’ ‘Please tell me you haven’t ever done that.’ ‘No no. Of course not. But some guys aren’t in it for the game, they only care about winning’.
So I have been naïve I guess. I mean as I have pointed out before, the world is full of jerks, and many of them play golf. It should go without saying that, just as in other sports, there are some people for whom the game means nothing and winning means everything. But this is Golf. With Tradition, and Etiquette, and The Honor Code, where players call the rules on themselves. Quitting because you can’t win doesn’t fit in there anywhere. I will just never understand how people can take up the game and then ignore the most important parts of it. The parts that set it apart from every other sport.
And so, to make sure The Offspring are never of the mistaken belief that winning is the only thing, we have a new rule.
If you start it, you WILL finish it. Even if you are so far in last place that there are triple digits between your score and the score of the person in 2nd to last, you WILL finish.
Because, as you have grumbled sooooo many times before, MOM has eyes in the back of her head, ESP, and the ability to instantly appear whenever unacceptable behavior is taking place. If you don’t finish I will know. And if you thought what happened after the infamous I-Have-Had-It-car-pool incident was bad, you don’t want to even think about what will happen if you withdraw from a tournament. Unless you have a broken bone, or a fever and are throwing up. Even us MOM’s can give a kid a break sometimes.
Comments