The Golfer's Wife

Well that was....short

Tiger Woods lost his match today. So he is out of the tournament. The big return ended a little prematurely. But by all accounts he was looking good and swinging well. And it wasn’t so much a matter of Tiger losing as it was Tim Clarke wining. Tiger played well. Clarke played fantastic. And you gotta figure that no matter how ready he was, not even Tiger could really expect to come back and perform at his top level right away. Okay, actually I’m sure Tiger did expect that. It’s why he wins. In any case, he showed that he is certainly physically capable of playing and I’m sure we’ll be seeing him again very soon.

And he wasn’t the only one. All the number 1 seeds are out: Vijay Singh, Sergio Garcia, and Padraig Harrington will all be watching from the bleachers ( that being a figure of speech only. I’m sure they all hopped the plane for home and if they watch at all it will be poolside with a cocktail in hand ).

Of course the real losers this weekend are Accenture and NBC. On Wednesday they were looking at their biggest audience and highest ratings ever. And now…..well, only golfing households like ours will be paying any attention. 

So glad you're back.

This weekend is the Accenture Match Play Tournament. More importantly for the golf world, this weekend Tiger returns. More excitement. More challenge. And of course, higher ratings. I’m sure you’ll be watching, right? 

Match play format is different than the normal stroke play format. For a description of match play here is what I wrote last year about this time.

For a description of how the tour feels about Tiger’s return see below. 

And in other news.....

So besides the unfortunate appearance of white, what else is going on in the world of professional golf?  Lessseeeee….The final round of the Clambake got rained out, so Dustin Johnson, who held a 4 shot lead, was declared the winner.

Tim Finchem insists that the Stanford St. Jude Championship will take place in June. In spite of the fact that R. Allen Stanford was served with legal papers in a multibillion dollar fraud case and his entire financial empire is crashing. 

Hank Haney is going to try to fix Charles Barkley’s notoriously bad swing. And he’s going to do it on television. So every one will know the results. Good luck with that.

Michelle Wie was 2nd in the SBS open at Turtle Bay in Hawaii last weekend. Her first tournament as a bona-fide card carrying member of the LPGA and she came in 2nd. It is looking increasingly likely I will be wrong. This is a good thing.

What else….what else.  Seems like there was something……

Oh.  Mr. Woods has announced he will be returning to the world of professional golf next week at the Accenture Match Play Championship. Not that any one cares or anything.

In which I continue the fight

I have made my feelings on wearing White very clear. Camilo insists on ignoring my advice. And as mentioned before, if any one can carry it off he can. And even he can’t really. He looks so much better in other colors. Soooooo much better…mmmmmm. Uh. Where was I. Oh yeah. White.

I was really hoping the rest of the tour would come to their senses over the winter and rid their closets of anything white.

Here is a picture of what Phil wore during the final round of the Buick Invitational.

*SIGH*

And it’s not just me. Here, read this. From an official golf magazine. The opinion of their official golf fashion director. Although I have to take issue with his statement “Save the white belt for beige trousers and a white golf shirt”. Don’t. Don’t save the white belt. Don’t EVEN BUY the white belt in the first place. White is for Wimbledon and wedding dresses.

I may be fighting an uphill battle here. But I will remain steadfast. I will continue until the only white on the golf course is the little round balls.

But those red patent leather shoes of Charley Hoffman?  I gotta get me some of those.

Second Fitting

It has been suggested to me that perhaps I was a little…..harsh shall we say, in my comments on ball fitting. So a little clarification. First off I have said, several times, that the type of ball you play does matter if you are good. For ball-type purposes I would define good as: consistently breaks 90 and/or consistently generates a club head speed of 80 mph or higher. And if we are all honest about it, this describes perhaps a quarter of the golfers out there. If you are good, this post does not apply to you.

For the rest of us….the type of ball doesn’t really matter.

Unless you think it does.

Golf, like many other sports is 80…85…heck 90% mental. The trick isn’t learning to drive the long ball, or sink the 3 foot putt. The trick is being able to do it consistently. Under all kinds of circumstances. There really isn’t that much difference between say, Vijay Singh’s game and Tiger Wood’s game. At that level of play the difference is not the equipment. Tiger and Vijay could trade equipment and Tiger would still win more than Vijay. The difference is mental. There is NO one on tour mentally tougher than Tiger. Vijay can, and has, hit terrific shots under pressure. Vijay hits a good shot under pressure most of the time. Tiger hits the big shot under pressure almost all the time. The man played with a fractured leg. He does not fold under pressure. In fact he seems to get better. On the tour it is not really how good your game is. Your game is VERY good or you aren’t there. The difference is how well you maintain that game over 4 days, in varying weather conditions, with fans who aren’t always..courteous shall we say. Can you keep it together enough mentally to allow you to focus on the must-make down hill putt? The putt that you could make practically without looking at it, if you were playing on a Tuesday afternoon with your friends, but is looking a little iffy here on Sunday afternoon with 100’s of people standing around the green and the chance for a playoff at stake? The mental part of the game is what separates the truly great from the rest of the field.

If you have reached a plateau and you just can’t seem to shave any more strokes off your game, you may say to yourself ‘Maybe if I played a different ball.’ So you go to the ball fitter, who says ‘Oh you definitely should be playing ball X.’  And says it with such confidence that it gives you confidence. You play a round with the new ball, and low and behold you shave 3 strokes off your game!  So of course it was the ball!

Only not really. It was really the fact that mentally you were ready to believe the ball would matter, so it did. Getting fitted for a new driver, or getting a new putter, would have the same effect. It’s not really the equipment, it’s the fact that you think the equipment will make you better. And so it really wouldn’t matter if it was the ball fitter who gave you confidence in the ball, or if you were a heavy believer in astrology and your astrologer gave you confidence in the ball. The point is you think the ball is going to make a difference, so it does.

For a couple rounds anyway. We all know people who continually change out parts of their equipment, and go on and on about how this new wedge or that new hybrid is what is going to take their game to the next level. And maybe it does for a round or two. But then they are right back where they were, and they are looking for the next piece of equipment to fix their game. They don’t spend any more time at the driving range. Or on the putting green. Or practicing their chip shots. They don’t spend any more time learning course management, or working on their concentration. They are sure the problem lies with their equipment. Needless to say they never really get any better.

So if you think it’s time for change, and a new ball will help, by all means go get fitted. Then take that ball to the putting green. Use it to practice your chip shots. Play an extra 9 holes with it each week. If you do that I bet you really will see an improvement in your game. And of course, it’s because of the ball.

The Fabulous Stump

Meet Sussex Spaniel Champion Clussexx Three D Grinchy Glee. Known to his friends and family as Stump. He won the Best In Show at Westminster last night, officially making him America’s Top Dog. Isn’t he wonderful? Just look at that face. And I love the color of his coat. I need a coat this color. 

In winning BIS Stump set two records. He is the first Sussex Spaniel to win BIS. He is also the oldest dog to win. Stump is 10. 70 in people years. Stump actually won his group ( Sporting Dogs ) at Westminster in 2004. Soon after that he got a very serious bacterial infection and spent 19 days in the vet hospital. He almost died. And his owner wasn’t even sure he was going to show him. He made the decision on Weds. Took him out for a walk around his driveway and decided what-the-heck. No pressure, no expectations. ‘I thought he might enjoy one more walk on the green carpet. It would be fun.’, said his handler/owner Scott Sommers. So here you have a 10 year old dog, who had retired from an already great show career, and had come back from the almost-dead, and he steps in the ring at the biggest dog show on the planet with no preparation, other than the fact that he’d been there 4 years ago. He walks on the green carpet, and wins Best of Breed. Then he walks on the green carpet again and wins Best in Group. And so he steps on the green carpet one more time, competing for Best In Show. He is competing against dogs that are 8 years younger than him, and have been training and building towards this moment for the whole year. And he wins the Whole Enchilada. He was so happy too. All the other dogs prancing and gliding around the ring. And there was Stump, happily plodding around the ring on his short little legs with his tail wagging. I swear he was thinking I don’t care if I win it’s just so fun to be here. It was wonderful to watch. And I wasn’t the only one. He was by far the crowd favorite.

The judge had no idea who he was, or how old he was. She said she picked him because ‘He’s just everything that you’d want in the breed, and I couldn’t say no to him. He is in fabulous shape.’

And just so you don’t think this has nothing at all to do with golf, one of the 6 dogs Stump was competing against to win BIS was a Scottish Deer Hound named Gayleward’s Tiger Woods. 

Golf in a Cave

Every year The Golfer and his brother exchange Member/Guests. And since what’s good for the gander is good for the goose, in the fall of every year The Women and I take a trip. Over the years we have been many places coast to coast. The criteria for said trips is entertainment, shopping and alcohol readily available and husbands and families not allowed to contact except in case of emergency. And every year I come back from the trip to find that some ‘household improvement’ has been made. That was, in fact, how the Tivo first made it’s appearance. When I left we didn’t have one. When I got home we did. This past fall the improvement was a flat screen TV mounted on an arm out on our patio. Because you don’t want to miss out on the Saturday round of the weekly tournament just because you have yard work to do. Uh hunh. Just how much yard work do you think has been getting down now that the TV is out there? Not much. Unless you count drinking beer and smoking a cigar as yard work.

Anyway. There is a show on the DIY network called Man Caves. Have you seen it? Well even if you haven’t I’m sure you can guess what it’s about. A couple of guys and their work-truck-packed-with-the-coolest-power-tools-ever shows up at some guys house and converts his basement/garage/sunroom etc. into the perfect male retreat. For obvious reasons this show is on The Golfers Tivo list.

In last weeks show ‘the guys’ converted a garage into a man cave for an avid golfer. Here is a picture of the finished product.

That back wall?  That’s a mural of the 17th hole at Pebble Beach. And what you can’t see is the putting green back behind the chair, in front of that mural. And the TV in the middle of that mural?  It’s actually a golf simulator. So the recipient of this cave can practice his swing.

The Golfer was pretty quite during this episode. You could almost hear the wheels turning in his brain. If he starts planning now he could have it all ready to install this fall. And the guys on the show did it all in one weekend, so how hard could it be really?

I said ‘This is The Wild West. It gets cold and it snows in the winter, and it gets hotter than Hades in the summer. If you want to get in your car and burn the back of your legs on the seat, or get up early so you can scrape the windows and warm up the car, that is your choice. BUT. When I get home from The Trip this fall I will be putting my car in my side of the garage. If that means I park on a putting green or obstruct your view of the 17th hole so be it.’

I don’t for one minute think that put an end to his plans. I have pretty much resigned myself to the fact that, this fall, after sipping cocktails in the sunshine somewhere, I will return to a putting green in the garage. The only question is: How long before the dogs and cat decide the grass on the putting green is a pretty good substitute for the snow covered back yard, and use it accordingly.

ROTFL

Green carpet prep

In spite of how it may seem it is not golf 24/7 here at The Household. We do have other things going on. Other interests. It’s golf maybe 12/6.

Anyway, if you recall I have an unexplainable fondness for, and fascination with, The Westminster Dog Show. And it is that time of year again. On Monday February 9th and Tuesday February 10th champions of the 4 legged variety will be strutting their stuff on the green carpet at Madison Square Gardens. 

Here is the list of the top 20 dogs as of December 31st. As you can see the Giant Schnauzer and the Pointer are way out in front. And there is only one Poodle, and even it is of the Standard variety. Not an annoying small Poodle in the bunch. Of course there is no guarantee that one of these dogs will win. And if you have an interest in a particular breed, or have a few minutes, you can peruse all the statistics at the Chronicle. Get a feel for how things stand in the dog world.

Also this year CNBC is airing a special report on Westminster and the world of dog shows in general. Which I will of course watch. The inside story!

Between The Canine Chronicle and CNBC you should be well prepared for The Show itself.

Speaking of which. Here is the website. And on Monday and Tuesday you can keep up with the winners of the breed judging during the day. If you want to. If for some reason you happen to have a slight obsession with it.  Personally I hit the site about once an hour. Really. I can’t explain it. But there it is.

Anyway. TV schedule.

CNBC Special Report -  Thursday February 5th, 9pm ET.

Westminster -  Monday February 9th.  8-9 ET -  USA Network
                                                          9-11 ET – CNBC
                       Tuesday February 10th  8 -11 ET USA Network.

 Set your Tivo now.

Can we take it up an inch?

So The Golf Channel was on the other day ( okay, so around here The Golf Channel is on every day. Not that anyone is ever really watching it. But it’s on. ) and as I was passing the TV there was a commercial which mentioned ‘ball fitting’. Ball fitting? Alright, perhaps my gender is showing here, but to me ‘fitting’ means clothes. Or at least shoes, or a hat. Something where the size of you matters. And it doesn’t matter what size you are, golf balls only come in one size. I suppose you could work on matching the color to your eyes, or getting a manufacturer whose stamp goes with your outfit, or something. Or maybe they are fitting the ball itself for a little set of plus fours?

 I didn’t know, so I did what any un-informed person does. I Googled it.

Turns out that, just like you can get a club fitting, you can get a ball fitting. First you have a Ball Launch Monitor session. Meaning you take a few of your clubs and hit some balls in front of a camera. A ‘fitting professional’ watches the film, measures your launch angle, club head speed, ball speed and spin. Then you answer questions as to what you want the ball to do. And – ta da – you are fitted with the right ball for you.

Uh huh.

I know that if you are very good, the kind of ball you play makes a big difference. But if you are that good you aren’t going to a ‘ball fitter’. And if you aren’t very good, than what the ball fitter tells you really isn’t going to help you any more than going to an astrologer and having them tell you what kind of ball to play.

Seriously people. Practice and playing experience. That’s what improves your game. That and having golf shoes that match your outfit, that match your golf bag, of course.